Articles
The Right Kind of Sorrow
Paul took a big risk when he wrote First Corinthians. Paul had enemies in that church, a church which he started, a church of whom he says, “For you are our epistle written in our hearts, known and read by all men; you are manifestly an epistle of Christ, ministered by us …” (2 Cor 3:2-3). If not for Paul, there would be no Corinthian church, and yet his fickle children in the faith (1 Cor 4:15) were heeding those who attacked and contradicted Paul. Thus he writes a hard-hitting, corrective letter to them and then tensely awaits their response.
Hearing nothing, he eventually leaves Ephesus going first to Troas, then on to Macedonia in search of Titus and news of the Corinthians’ reaction to his scolding (2 Cor 2:12-13). Their paths finally crossed, and the news was good! In 2 Cor 7 we read of the floodgates of Paul’s heart opening and the backlog of anxiety pouring forth:
“I am exceedingly joyful in all our tribulation. For indeed, when we came to Macedonia, our flesh had no rest, but we were troubled on every side. Outside were conflicts, inside were fears. Nevertheless, God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus, and not only by his coming, but also by the consolation with which he was comforted in you, when he told us of your earnest desire, your mourning, your zeal for me, so that I rejoiced even more” (7:4-7).
But Paul’s relief is not merely a matter of his own personal unburdening. Rather, he is relieved that the Corinthians had actually taken his words of correction to heart and begun rectifying their mistakes: “For even if I made you sorry with my letter, I do not regret it; though I did regret it. For I perceive that the same epistle made you sorry, though only for a while. Now I rejoice, not that you were made sorry, but that your sorrow led to repentance. For you were made sorry in a godly manner, that you might suffer loss from us in nothing. For godly sorrow produces repentance to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death” (7:8-10). He goes on and tells of their determination to correct the faults that Paul had addressed (7:11).
The Sorrow of the World. What is the sorrow of the world “that produces death”? When those who are unenlightened by God’s word sin, their conscience, if not already seared, convicts them of wrongdoing. One does not have to be a Christian to have an operative conscience; it is a function of the mind that evaluates one’s behavior relative to his belief system. An offended conscience is intended to be painful, for that pain spurs one to make needed correction and restore peace inwardly and outwardly – ultimately with God if possible.
But what happens when people feel guilt, regret or even remorse, but they don’t seek the proper remedy for their sin?
Some may do as Judas and go to the extreme of taking their life. Judas’ conscience was deeply injured by his actions: “Then Judas, His betrayer, seeing that He had been condemned, was remorseful … saying, ‘I have sinned by betraying innocent blood’ … Then he threw down the pieces of silver in the temple and departed, and went and hanged himself” (Mt 27:3-5). This is not the outcome God wants for us, even for those who sin so egregiously as Judas.
While not everyone reacts this way, there are other ways to mismanage guilt so that spiritual death is the outcome. King Saul openly grieved over David’s rebukes of his murderous intentions, but Saul never had a true change of heart. Peter’s initial reaction to the Lord’s divine majesty was to fall down before Him and ask Him to “depart from me, for I am a sinful man, O Lord!” (Lk 5:8). This is not what God wants either. God doesn’t want further estrangement; He wants reconciliation and restoration! And this in large measure depends on our willingness to confront the problem.
Godly Sorrow. “Godly sorrow produces repentance to salvation, not to be regretted.” What is required for one to respond to correction with repentance rather than resentment, retaliation or fruitless regret?
Part of the answer lies in an earlier passage of 2 Cor: “Therefore we make it our aim, whether present or absent, to be well pleasing to Him. For we must all stand before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive the things done in the body … whether good or bad” (5:9-10). Is the judgment of Christ real to us? Paul called this judgment a “terror” in the next verse: “Knowing, therefore, the terror of the Lord, we persuade men …”. While we are blessed by the grace of God with forgiveness of our sins, this should not breed indifference or complacency within us. Sin is disobedience to God, an affront to His purity, an expression of ingratitude toward the One who has blessed us so much. Sin is also corrosive to society, harmful to friends, family and brethren. These truths should drive us to correction and amendment when we fail.
This also presupposes humility, for only the humble will gratefully receive correction. Pride, an overinflated sense of self, interferes with confession and repentance: “For I say … to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly …” (Rom 12:3). Due to their insecurities and fragile self-image, some cannot bear to confront their own mistakes. They fear they will lose standing, their “brand” will be tarnished, people will think less of them if they come clean and admit their faults. But actually the opposite is true, both with men and God. We all can spot the stone-waller, the blame-shifter, the spinner, the denier. We can spot them because we see so many repeated examples of it. You’d think even the PR agents could figure out that people have more respect for those who own up to their sins than the Andrew Cuomos of the world who deny, minimize and blame to their last breath.
Confession and repentance are liberating. Sorrow that seeks God rather than repels Him will find what it truly needs: healing, relief, affirmation of faith and purpose, the respect of others, a life of steady improvement and progress. Those who sorrow in a worldly manner are destined to make the same mistakes, live in frustration, search in vain for true peace. They trudge onward with a false sense of self-righteousness, finding fault with others to obscure their own shortcomings, the human foibles that make them just like the rest of us.
